...

pernah tak rasa mcm kita dah mencapai sesuatu yg tinggi tapi tetiba kita jatuh?
atau mcm dah nak sampai ke destinasi tapi rupanya kita mengundur?
atau mcm dah nak grad to rupanya kantol satu paper lagi?
atau mcm dah genggam bintang tapi rupanya kelip-kelip?
so close yet so far?
aku pernah. in fact, tiap2 bulan.
dan aku dah mula bosan.
dan aku tak tau kalau ia berbaloi.
atau maybe tak la seindah yang digambarkan.

teguran untuk diri

terjumpa videos ni. PEKKK! ada jugak yang sebiji terkena muka sendiri. so, ini adalah peringatan untuk diri sendiri...if you find them very useful, Alhamdulillah. every man and woman is a da'i, kan?


aurat....ye, bini ustaz pun lalai jugak..huhuhuhu!


Pernah buat? hehehehe......


this is a hard one...byk sgt benda cantik2 nak ditengok!


Masya-Allah....malu sendiri plak!


huiiii...bahaya, bahaya!


hidung tinggi, berlagak, sombong, poyo, cas bagus...semoga kita semua tak tergolong dalam kumpulan ini.


we have parents and we will be parents one day.....


DUSHHH!!!! adeh, sebijik lagi kat muka sendiri!!!!!

as i am writing this, ada la pulak 'angel' kat sebelah telinga cakap "Jangan kat blog aje tau...pastu macam gitu jugak"....dush! kapow! slap! amik ko kena lagik!!!!!!

"hehehehe...baik, ustaz... :-)"

memories of football

Memory 1
masa aku dlm umur 7-10 years old, Abah masih lagi larat nak stay up utk lyn bola. he would wake up, boil some water and then ktik,ktik,ktik...the sound of spoon banging the big old mug (mug tu dia punya sorg, org lain takleh guna) and a heady smell of Nescafe. for 90 minute, the household would briefly woken up by his "arghhhh!" or "goal!" or "ish!". skang dia dah kurang dah layan bola nih..awal2 malam tu ada la...dah malas nak bangun mlm buta lagi. dah tua...hehehehehe.

Memory 2
Aku kat matriks masa tu. Kolej Chedang. baru je enrol dlm dua, tiga hari. masa tu tgh Euro kalau tak silap. hati ni dah gundah gulana sbb nak tgk England main. masa tu terminat kat Beckham n gang MU. so aku pun tanya2 la sesiapa yg nak tgk bola...suma tgk aku pelik. nasib baik ada sorg minah klate tu nak tgk Itali...tapi tak de minat sgt. then masa odw gi kafe, terdengar ada guys yg tny pak guard (kitaorg panggil Achik) bleh tak jgn kunci cafe awal sbb nak tgk bola....Achik kata boleh. heheheheh..nak menyibuk gak la. so, after dinner, aku n minah klate tu pun turun la...cissss, ktorg duaorg je budak pompuan yg turun. malu la plk, tapi dah berdiri dpn pintu kafe, masuk je la. siap mamat2 tu ada yg baik hati bagi air n gelas..buat basah2 tekak. layan je la. dalam pada syok tu, England dpt lak satu peluang utk score..aku dah tak dgr dah suara org lain. elok je one player tu tendang bola aku pun bangun smbil jerit "GOOOOOOOLLLLL!". baru sedar yg org lain takde pun wat camtu. malunya aku tah mcmana aku bleh sembunyi bwh meja sbb sedar2 je aku dah kat bwh tu mgadap kaki kwn aku. pelan2 aku kuar smbil sengih kerang busuk. mamat2 tu gelak2 "rilek kak..sabar,sabar..". well, England lost that match but the next day i won quite a few guy friends. ada la benda yg nak diajak berbual agaknya..and some of them were really good friends of mine.

Memory 3
WC 2006. Hubby peminat Italy. aku dah frust sbb Japan n Spain terkeluar awal. umah takde astro so rely on Singapore's channel 5 je la. malam tu Final Italy vs Brazil. dlm pada kengkonon nak teman cik abg tgk aku bleh tertido. kaw2 punya tido smpi tak sedar pun org tu terlompat2, terjerit2. tau2 je dah pagi nak gi sklh. bangun2 je tanya "apasal tak kejut?" dia kata "huh, tido mcm batang balak, kena pijak pun tak sedar." heheheh...alkisah nak layan footbal.

WC 2010 - england vs usa

"bongok punya keeper..ada ke tangkap bola mcm tu?????? keeper bola baling aku pun tau tak leh tangkap bola mcm tu...ni lagi international level!!!!!!!" ye tuan-tuan dan puan-puan...itulah sebahagian dpd komen pengulas sukan tak bertauliah di sebuah rumah di parit raja. (cik abg, a Liverpool fan menyumpah seranah coz Green mensia-siakan peluang utk menang, thanks to Liverpool capt @ England capt Steven Gerard).



i sytayed up to watch the game..usually bola tgk aku, tp semalam bleh plak mata ni tahan. maybe skang tgh cuti sklh and my parents are off for a vacation in China (hoping they wont buy me those ugly blouses) so i have the tv n house all to myself. hah kau...tgh hari br bangun. tu pun bangun sbb MIL ajak gi jemputan umah sedara..kut tak, mau terlajak smpi after zohor.

i'm no football fanatic..but i do watch few games one in a while. and i cant follow EPL frequntly enough...tak tahan nak ikut 6-7 bulan punya league. i prefer the WC, the Champion's League, Euro etc..u know...yg tak amik masa panjang n dah tentu2 team dia suma best2. i love the sporting spirit, the tacticals and the fans. ooh, do you notice the players? i swear footballers have the best @$$ in the whole of athletes!!!!!!

back to the england - usa game...Capello needs to do something bout the defenders. the absence of Rio Ferdinand is hurting the team...and the keeper...i read somewhere he is one with many bola terlepas in EPL! macamana pilih keeper mcm tu???? not to mention he was the 3rd keeper inthe team. whoaaaaa....i know, stupid move kan? the US team gave quite a good challenge...ranked 14 (kalau tak silap) in FIFA list, they know that match was everyone was waiting for. so much for "this is england's best team in WC since 1966".

phewww...ni baru demam bola. still another 29. 28 days left before WC ends...like my father always say "bola itu bulat, mcm2 boleh berlaku"..yeah, as if pernah sgt la bola tu bersegi2.

(cadangkan?)

aku melihat dengan mata berkaca
mereka ditinggal umpama tiada harga
berbekas lebam dan luka seluruh badan
berbekas di hati tiada kesan


aku mendengar hampir tuli
tangisan dan jeritan bernada tinggi
biarpun sipi-sipi terngiang di telinga
gambar tersiar bisu, tiada suara


aku merasa pedih dan ngilu
beperti garam disapu ke luka baru
dalam hati tak berhenti menangis
pujuk dan rayu bagai tak tiris


apa hak mereka menzalimi zuriat
hilang gentar pada dosa dan akibat
dimana hakku dinafikan waris
apa dayaku rahsia Tuhan tiada bergaris

 

Doa Nabi Zakaria. a.s.

Robbi laa tazar dan wantakhoirul waaa rithiin
Tuhanku, janganlah engkau tinggalkan daku seorang diri padahal engkau Tuhan yang paling baik dari segala orang yang mewarisi

Surah Al-Anbiya:21:89

Robbi hablee miladunlakaa zurritontoiyiban innaka samii uddoa
Tuhanku, berilah kepadaku dari sisi-mu keturunan (anak) yang baik, sesungguhnya engkau Tuhan yang sangat mendengar doa

Surah Ai Imran 3:38

dewy readmore books

i cried buckets reading this. wat's it about? a cat, a librarian and a small town. i'm a cat person, so everything cat is a concern to me. hehehehe...

if you are not a cat fan or not really care bout a cat, then u might not relate to the story. the started with a librarian in a bleak small town of Spencer found a kitten in a book return bin one freezing morning. a whole new future for the cat revel onwards. from one misery librarian to another took care of Dewey Readmore Books until the whole town seemed to adopt him. you see, cat is a creature of personality...they dont care a thing bout how the world spins, what they know is the world spin around them. unlike dogs, they dont obey you..but you obey them, unwillingly. as if cats have magic spell they inherit since the Pharaoh-worshipping-days. thats what dewey did to a small town facing uncertain future during the horrible ecomic downturn then.

this book recalls all the antics of dewey.. his first experience outdoor, first trip to the vet, a taste of fame, a possession of a library. this book evokes the warm n fuzzy feeling you get when you remember your first pet. the heartbroken moment when your first pet died. it's everything you may experience in bringing up a pet (wat...'bringing up' only for children ke?). luckily the author who is the librarian has quite a sense of humour so once in a while you may smile amidst the tears rolling down your gebu cheeks.

nuff said...give it a try. you might understand how cat lovers feel...better yet, you might think there is a human after all inside a cat (reincarnation, anybody?).

dia suka merapu

suami saya suka benda merapu...so this entry is dedicated to all the merapu-ness in him.



he esp likes this one very much (too much!)



this one too..

FK or Q?

just got back from the movie watching Lagenda Budak Setan. saje je nak tgk cerita yg diadaptasi daripada novel yg pernah aku gila-gilakan dulu. dont quite remember the whole storyline of the book actually but i remembered feeling sorry for Ayu instead of Kashah.



so, what di i think of the movie? touching but didnt really thug the string of my heart. you see, Lisa Surihani is really such an eye candy. so does Farid Kamil. They do look good together and there is the sparks between them. but somehow, the director seemed too focused on the PDA - faces too close to each other, hugging, hair caressing, chasing around. picnic at the garden (honestly, u really cant have a decent picnic for two without getting stares from people around here). They overworked the chemistry...but then, Ahadiat akashah always overworked it in his books. so the sparks dont really developed into a big bang kinda fireworks.  FK played kashah well...kudos to his naughty smirks n playful gestures. but he's not good close-up. he should really start taking care of his skin more. Lisa is good too. she is natural, is much better expressing her feeling compared when she first started scting n again, a really good eye candy. (i know la...cik abg kat sblh asik la tersengih2 n memuji2 bila Lisa kuar).

BUT, all things between Kashah-Ayu fell apart the moment Que Haidar entered. as we walked put of the cinema, i can only remembered the scene where Ayu got beaten up. QUE OWNED THE MOMENT!!!!!!! not to mention Lisa actually showed a reaction that i never seen before. I never thought Lisa could be at the same level as Que. thank God for Que. Rasanya betul2 kena tibai Lisa dlm scene tu. oh Que, Linda Jasmin is soooooo stupid if she barred you from acting again!!

hmmmm......then the whole dynamic of Kashah - Ayu relationship disappeared when ayu became Amalia. the new girl isn't as good as everyone else (though in they had Ogy ahmad Daud as acting coach). since when a plastic surgery changed one's height and skin colour????/ not to mention facial bone structure (sorry, i'm a avid fan of CSI) . can't lisa just have a team of make-up artistes instead??? cerita hantu n cerita lawak2 bleh plak kuar bajet beli silikon bagai.

My favourite moment is when Kashah first greet his newborn baby. he said "awak anak perempuan saya....". oh, part tu mmg tak leh tahan, terusik jap hati I yg sensitif bab2 baby nih...hehehehe. Hats off to Fazura too. she really can act, saving the film towards the end of it. I must say that the plot is a bit hurried...tak halus bak kata cik abg ni. tergesa2. ye la...sejati mana pun cinta kau, takkan la sekejap sgt jangkamasa nak mencapai level 'cinta sedalam lautan Hindi' kan?

there, that's my two sen worth on this film. not a waste of money at all. not at all. did I mention there will be a sequel?

19 minutes

this is my favourite picoult's book so far. remember the columbia incident? well, the story is loosely based or rather inspired by the dreadful shooting in a high school there.

this book revolves around a boy who is bullied his whole schooling life (betul ke ayat aku nih?). It seems that he has been bottling up his feeling and emotion. the only way he vent put the anger and frustration is by video game which he developed himself. at the same time, he has a soft spot for a girl that eventually become gf of his enemy. and one day, he came to school armed with loads of guns and start shooting. like any picoult book, there will be court room dramas, unexpected twist and hopeful prediction for both the accused and the victims.

honestly, i read this with tissues in hand because i think anyone can relate to bullying (physically, mentally, emotionally and verbally) in one part of his/her life. when u grow up in a boarding school, u feel the pressure even more. while we pity on the bully victim, have we thought of how they feel? the most we can do is to stop at once any bullying activities we CAN see...but bullying happens every minute behind our back. in the shooting incident of columbia high school, we pity the ones died. picoult try to put herself in the shooter' family's shoes..which are quite a big ones to fill in. imagine the feeling of uncertainty, being the target of anger and confusion. as if you never know the boy you raised up the whole life..where do we go wrong? is there a genetic mishap along the way? is it nature or nurture?

as i read the book, i felt like i went back to my teenagers life. true, bullying in my hostel wasn't as hostile as it was way long ago. i remembered being estranged by my friends, being accused of so many things that i didnt do, constantly being compared to the other better friends, being misunderstood by one of my best friend eventhough my intention was for her own good, etc, etc. i made it my principle to not do onto others the things i dont like people do to me. RESPECT, HONOUR and ACCEPT other people as they are.

yup, hostel life was ages ago...but i still feel the same hatred and dislike when i see or remember a few people that make myself misarable. and for that, i thank them for making me stronger and a better person.